#518: Q&A with Tim — Current Morning and Exercise Routines, Holotropic Breathwork, Ambition vs. Self-Compassion, Daily Practices for Joy, Ontological Shock, and More

Hello, boys and girls, ladies and germs. This is Tim Ferris. Welcome to another episode of the Tim Ferris Show, where it is usually my job to sit down with world class performers of all different types to tease out the habits, routines, favorite books, and so on that you can apply and test in your own life. Or lives as the case might be. This time we have a slightly different format and I am the guest. I teste a fan supported model in twenty nineteen, as some of you know. I ended up returning to ads by request. That's a very long story, and you can read more about it at Tim.blog slash podcast experiment. But This is all to say I still sit down occasionally with the supporter group in a private Facebook group for Q and A's and fun conversations, things like that, just for the hell of it. And we did a live QA on YouTube.

Recently, I answered their questions on my current morning and exercise routines, holotropic breath work, ambition versus self compassion, diet. And everything from ontological shock to what is currently bringing me a lot of joy, how to cultivate not caring what other people think, and much more. With all of that said, we cover a lot of topics. So I hope you enjoy this. As much as I did.

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Tim. Optimal minimal. this altitude I can run flat out for a half mile before my hands start shaking. Can I answer your personal question? Now it's in the time.

A cybernetic organism, living tissue over metal enter scale. No How's everybody doing? Thanks for joining. I'm wearing a C4 shirt for people who might be interested. You can check out C four Foundation. And we're going to do a QA.

as promised and the Q and A will alternate from live stream, which means the Chat. box where everyone is chatting at the moment. You'll be able to submit. Questions. And Why don't we

Start with perhaps a few of the questions that were pre-submitted. So I have a list of questions that were submitted. And I will do my best to take a stab. At those questions and we'll just go back and forth.

Until I run out of time. That's about it. So Let's jump into it. We see people from all over the world here from uh Many different countries, Scotland. From the Netherlands. Any other people here from outside?

The US CMDX, I wish I knew what that was. I don't know what that is. So perhaps somebody can tell me. Devon England, Montana. Vancouver, Island, London. Canada.

SoCal, Berlin. Mm-hmm. Montreal. Great. Germany, Ireland, all over. So

Let us just jump into this QA and I'll say this one more time that we have questions that were submitted in advance. We also have live chat and I'll alternate going back and forth between the two. Hopefully we'll have some fun. And I'll do my best. Not to provide completely idiotic. Answers. I can't give any guarantees on the questions, though, although I think most of these questions are quite strong. So let's just go to a couple of softball pitches and then I will jump into the live stream.

Number one. This is from Sarah S E R A. Hey Tim, what's a twenty twenty one updated version of your morning routine? It is actually quite consistent, I think, with past morning routine. The basics are 20 minutes of meditation first thing in the morning. That's generally going to be some form of transcendental meditation, then brushing teeth, doing the basics of self care and getting downstairs to have Pooh air tea, usually peak P IQ U. E. Pooh R T and I'll alternate black and green.

Or coffee of some type. And as long term listeners will know, I am a huge fan of both Four Stigmatic. Mushroom coffee and layered superfood creamer. I had both This morning, in fact. From that point on, it really depends on the day. So I organize my week.

in thematic approach meaning rather than taking the five types of activities that I need or want to cover each week and spreading them throughout each day, I tend to have a day dedicated to different types of work. So Tuesday will involve lots and lots. of phone calls. Or at least that's when I'll batch my phone calls with my team and with other people. So very frequently I will not do any type of journaling on that day, but start walking and talking. So I'll get a lot of my sun exposure on Tuesdays. And

So on and so forth. So it really depends on the day. There could be writing following the caffeination. There could be exercise, so twice a week. I'll get into this next. I do some form of acrobatic or inversion training in the form of typically acro yoga. And that leads to the next question from Mark Chavez. What is your current exercise routine and what cool exercise equipment or gadgets are you using? So my weekly routine right now was really, I suppose

First forged in Quarantine. So during quarantine began doing acro yoga twice a week via Zoom with someone named Jason Neimer as the instructor. And practicing with my girlfriend provided us both with physical contact, additional just physical contact and play.

Several hours. of additional contact and play per week. but also gave us a fantastic way to move because there are forms of exercise that really don't entail a lot of movement through space. Acro yoga happens to include all the elements, both acrobatic and therapeutic. So we would do say 45 to 60 minutes of inversion practice, which would include forearm stands, handstands, and so on. And there are many different training tools to use for that. Then do what is known as L basing, where I'm on my back holding my girlfriend in the air with my feet and hands, and we have different roles and responsibilities in that dynamic. And then doing some version of time massage.

Often with traction. towards the end of that workout. And it's the combination of the sort of sympathetic activation and parasympathetic off ramp that I think. leads to a great sense of well being physic and emotionally for the rest of the day.

So twice a week, let's just call it Tuesday. Thursdays I would have Acro in the morning. That would be right after the Poer Tier coffee. Then twice a week. Currently, this is post-COVID climbing. So I do bouldering and also top roping. I haven't done my lead climbing cert yet, so I'm not lead climbing. and have really been enjoying doing that. And the two combine very well. Acro

is really very much pushing based, so you're going to be pushing away. or stabilizing with a pushing movement of some type with both your arms and your legs. Of course, in rock climbing, you do have pushing in the legs, but it is largely pulling otherwise. And so I find that That tends to balance out the

say antagonistic muscle groups. So that you don't develop if you approach it in a moderate way, which I am, you don't develop the repetitive stress pain and injuries that have plagued me for most of my life by the virtue of overdoing things, or I should say the vice of overdoing things. So even though my body might be able to handle climbing three or four times a week, I am limiting myself to twice a week. And that has been fantastic. It has meant that

Despite the fact I had complete shoulder reconstruction on my left shoulder in the early two thousands and elbow surgery on my right elbow. More recently I have been able to train without extended pain. Of course little nicks and bruises and so on. So we have climbing twice a week, we have Acro twice a week. And then we have weight training typically of some type one to two times per week. This is nothing fancy. It's something along the lines of say an Occam's protocol in the four hour body.

Or killable swings. It's very basic. It's generally gonna be twenty to forty minutes and it is for the purpose of Injury prevention first and foremost, not performance enhancement. And uh last but not least, walking. I walk. a fair amount. On Tuesdays during calls, I would say I walk four

three to five hours minimum and do my best, certainly when I have access to trails and so on. to walk for a minimum of an hour per day. And I find that Walking is not just physically. Therapeutic, but psychoemotionally incredibly Therapeutic. So that is what the exercise routine looks like. So we checked off two of those. Let's try a few questions from

the live stream. So we'll look at a couple of questions from the live stream here. Edgar Inuwe, I think, is how we pronounce that question. What is your process to determine if you're going the right direction? Sometimes we might get lost in trying to accomplish things instead of thinking about what is worth working for.

Really, this is an energetic canary in the coal mine for me in the sense that if you find yourself low energy, which is very often accompanied by depressive or pessimistic thoughts, then I will do a number of things, including eighty twenty analysis.

and some form of dreamlining is outlined in the four hour work week. But I will very frequently take the eighty twenty analysis and apply it in two columns. And those are the Say twenty percent of people in activities that are producing eighty percent or more of my peak.

positive emotional states and then on the other side peak negative emotional states or Negative it. Adds and negative subtractions. And I will look at that, but but really it's just

using a simple rubric like How quickly do you fall asleep? And how do you feel when you first wake up? When you first wake up, is there a feeling of dread of oh fuck, I have to slog through another day of not really knowing where I'm going? Or is it a different feeling? So for me As Jodie Foster once said.

I believe could be misattribution, but in the end, winning is sleeping well, something along those lines. So it's really how do you feel right before you go to bed or when you go to bed, and how do you feel right when you wake up. And if If something is off, I believe you know it. It doesn't need to be put into a spreadsheet and analyzed. And then The question is figuring out where to focus. And to that point

I am actually going to hop to another question. Here in front of me. Which might be related on some level. This is a question from Steve Schwab. And this might seem like a hard left turn, but I don't think it is. So Steve Schwab's question is I have constant thoughts about the meaning

Or meaning less Of life and discomfort with death. Therefore, I distract myself with work. Do you have any recommendations on managing these thoughts? And I wanted to bring this up because let's say you are having the experience of a malaise you are having trouble falling asleep or you have certain level of anxiety about the unknown, or you wake up and feel

that you are without direction. I think those feelings are often combined with these difficulties or challenges that Steve is outlining. So Do I have any recommendations on managing these thoughts? I'm not gonna start with an answer to that. I'll start by saying that for the last several months I have had constant thoughts about the meaninglessness of life and quite a bit of discomfort or angst. around death. So what am I doing? So in this case I'm not gonna provide an answer necessarily because I also think that's a very personal thing.

But I'll tell you how I am looking to reboot the system. and hopefully navigate that. Number one is I'm gonna re read Victor Frankel's Book Man's Search for Meaning, which I've been meaning to reread for a very long time. I also have a book a friend recommended called Smile at Fear. I can't vouch for it yet because I haven't read it. The author I'm going to butcher this name, Chogum.

Trunkpa that's C H O G Y A M T R U. N G P A but smile at fear. The title. Should find you the book. And I'm also

Going Two Read biographies. of people who found meaning. And really, I don't know how much of it is finding meaning versus choosing meaning. And I don't think there is Any inherent

single objective meaning of life that should guide your steps and decisions. It seems to me that it is a personal Decision. of sorts. Perhaps that is with a vocation. Perhaps you feel called to something. Perhaps you pursue something. but I'm looking for models of people who have done that. And so I think biographies will also

hold an important position in my trying to navigate. This particular Period in my life. So there you have My answer in a way.

to both of those. All right. So let me scroll down, see what other questions we have in the live stream. Andrew Robinson, if you were asked to give a commencement speech, what would be the core message? The core message would be you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with, so pick them very carefully and prune very carefully over time because Some friends are for a night, some for a season, and some for life, and All are welcome. There is a place and a time, and there are certainly many benefits and enjoyments to be had for all, but those categories can change, and not everyone is forever. Alright.

additional questions in the stream. This is from Johnny Miller. Are any of the maps or Johns Hopkins studies that you're aware of looking at the therapeutic effect of holotropic breath work? What do you view as the potential and opportunities for breath work? So for those who are not familiar, maps.org is a nonprofit that is the driving force behind the phase three studies for MDMA assisted psychotherapy for

PTSD and this very often involves veterans, victims of sexual abuse, et cetera. M D May has been shown to have tremendous promise. There was a huge Cover story. That is the cover of the New York Times print edition, uh, discussing uh maps and

Rick Doblin's work and so on in this area. And Johns Hopkins. at least in this particular reference. It's looking at psilocybin. which is the psychoactive or one of the psychoactive compounds found in Slossy mushrooms or magic mushrooms for Treating things like nicotine addiction.

End of life, existential distress and cancer patients, etc. I'm not aware of any studies being sponsored by maps. Or being conducted at Johns Hopkins that incorporate holotropic breath work specifically. But I think there is tremendous Certainly and this is not a discovery of mine or anything novel from me. There are

I believe very interesting applications of breath work both to therapy and somatic awareness, somatic release. That would be true in something like Hakomi therapy, H A K O M I, which I think is a fantastic adjunct to any type of psychedelic assisted therapy. It can also be used, and certainly this is true in holotropic breath work, which is so named because the Tropic portion.

refers to turning towards holo wholeness, turning towards wholeness. Right, so you would have heliotropic flowers, for instance, that turn towards the sun. Holotropic would be turning towards wholeness. And it was created Much like the drumming of Michael Harner. This would be a separate example. holotropic breath work was created by Stan Groff.

who was and is a psychiatrist or psychotherapist originally from the Czech Republic, who is looking for an alternative to psychedelic compounds after they were illegalized. during the Nixon administration. And you can use intense breath work such as holotropic breathwork to experience non ordinary states of consciousness, what some might call altered states of consciousness. Without drugs.

And there is value in this, certainly, and my recommendation to anyone who approaches me and asks about psychedelics. Is Often, unless it's contraindicated for them, and there are some contraindications, that they experience something like holotropic breathwork first, because A, it's legal. And B, it does not involve any drugs, which can provoke a lot of anxiety in many people. Uh so I view that as a precursor.

Or a prerequisite almost. to engaging in any type of psychedelic therapy. But I'm not aware of any studies. I do believe that Jamie Weel W H E A L is involved or maybe involved in some studies related to holotropic breath work. And that is not the only Breathwork that can be used for all of the purposes that I have been describing. There are many others.

Alright, let's jump to Another question in the stream. And thanks for joining everybody. This is fun. I enjoy this. Just see a note from Gun Shin. Careful with pseudo shamans though. Yes, be careful with pseudo shamans.

And rent shamans, or Yogawaska practitioners. If anyone calls themselves a shaman, in fact, I would say generally that is a red flag and you should probably steer clear of them. Because the well trained indigenous practitioners or those who s who've spent decades working in specific lineages. In my experience, without exception.

Do not call themselves shaman. They have a particular term usually pulled from one of the native languages like Quechua or Spanish or fill in the blank. to describe what they do. So

Someone runs up to you. With a voucher for discounted Shamanic experiences run the other direction. Question from Reese. Zanino, in a recent podcast you talked about joint pain. Have you tried fish oil moxa sticks or acupuncture? What has been the most effective tool for you? I've tried all these things. Moxa I found interesting. Moxa or Moxa Bustion, Moxa sticks, using radiant heat at the joint.

above the skin. So you're taking a burning stick and holding it near the skin, definitely not on the skin. What I have found most helpful for certain types of joint issues, like elbow pain, for instance, from climbing, is a modulating volume. So There is a dose that will make the exercise a poison, right? As parasals would say. So if you exercise too much,

You are going to suffer the consequences. And so one is really just finding a cadence of exercise that works where you can still adapt and get stronger. without causing chronic tendinosis, et cetera. That's number one. Number two is working the muscles that act in opposition. So if you're climbing and doing a lot of pulling, for instance, you're going to be working the flexors of the forearm tremendously. So you'd want to do some Complimentary exercises with the extensors and you can uh use any number of devices for that. You could use also a bucket of rice. There are many exercises that rock climbers use involving a large bucket of rice Which I found helpful. Voodoo floss.

created by my friend Kelly Starrett. I have found tremendously helpful also to use after climbing for the arms specifically, although it can be used for many different parts of the body. So people can look up Voodoo Floss, I'm sure, on YouTube to find videos of Kelly demonstrating how this can be used. And otherwise contrast therapy, hot cold. So I have a hot tub. I also have a sauna. You could certainly just use a hot bath. If you are fortunate enough to have. Two baths, you could have one hot and then one full of ice and at an extremely cold temperature. So I have a

chest freezer that I have converted into a coal plunge. Be sure to unplug the freezer so that you don't electrocute yourself and Based on some recommendations from Cal Kingsbury modified. meaning really just caulking.

to fully waterproof the freezer to make it a cold plunge. So I will go hot cold, hot cold, hot cold. Usually let's just call it three minutes in each. And this is well documented for recovery effects. And then nutrition. So those are a few of the things, a few of the levers that I have pulled most recently at least.

Or rather prevent. elbow pain and this also applies to my shoulder. And Last but not least, I would say technique before volume. So in the case of rock climbing, I do foresee a point where I will be able to train three or four or more times per week. Right now my technique is so

Inefficient. And my joints. Or More accurately, my tendons and ligaments. Have not

Strengthened. at the same pace as my musculature, so I'm being very, very cautious. But there will be a point, and I hope to climb for many decades where I'll be able to add volume to that. All right. So I get this question a lot. Do you know of any psychedelic retreats that I can recommend? I can't do that, of course, because

As much as I wish I could. Immediately. Whatever I recommend would suffer as one listener called it the hug of death, and they would get more applications than they could accept. They would attempt to increase capacity And then quality and customer service would go through the floor and it would be a complete disaster for everyone involved.

So Frank Chen. Who or what has consistently brought you joy in the past six months, one year, three years, five years? Well, I would say my g if we're talking who, you know, my girlfriend's the first who comes to mind and then Of course we have Molly Pup. My companion.

Uh my second girlfriend. And then That's one and the same. It's a joke, folks. I'm saying Molly is my other girlfriend. And than best friends, et cetera. So that's kind of self evident, I suppose. But the what has consistently brought me joy in the past six months, one year Consistent joy period. in the last year during Covid I have found to be tremendously challenging, but I would say

Two things come to mind and that is extended time in nature where I do not hear the noise of mankind. And I say that right now because I'm sitting in a house where we have construction on almost every side and it is driving me cuckoo bananas. Extended time in nature, that involves also Rucking, so taking a weighted backpack, I use Go Ruck. for training purposes and just going for long hikes in old growth forests, if at all possible. Of course, nature anywhere

I think is very medicinal. But Tall trees. Canopy is particularly Calming for my system. The Japanese might call it tree bathing.

And then also learning more about the plants and animals so that you can Click. the dial a few notches on the resolution of what you see because of course Until you have labels for things, until you have names for things, it is very difficult to distinguish them from the background. of say your visual experience. That's why

Children. infants and toddlers and so on labels so that they can distinguish between chair. Table, wall, and so on. So that they aren't just patterns of light and color and shadow that are somehow I suppose.

Indistinguishable. And To do that you need You need names, you need labels. So I've taken walks with field biologists. I have taken

Walks with biologists of several different types just through common public trails. to learn to be able to to identify. Different trees. That's where I started because uh at least on the east coast where I first did this.

The biologist said to me, Look, we could try To learn flowers and there are gonna be hundreds of different wildflowers and you're gonna have tremendous Trouble. separating one from the next and it could be very frustrating. Or I could teach you eight trees and you'll be able to identify

Ninety percent of the trees that you see here. And I found that to be good advice. So those those are two things. Time and nature. Often moving, not just sitting still, but that's personal preference. And then learning the plants and animals. The

flora and fauna of that given area. Daniel. Viva, I'm not sure if that's how you pronounce it, but that's how I would read it. Any plans for different projects over the next two to three years? I think there is a decent chance that I will finally write or rather finish,'cause I'm actually pretty far through it. The screenplay for the four hour work week, which would be

Kind of a best in show Zoolander. comedy of sorts, but it would all be based on true events. And there would be a lot of philosophy and a lot of I think practical takeaways. Along the lines of something like

Fight Club. So That's kind of my pet project in the back of my mind that I have not yet finished and I really should finish. So I envision that. probably being a major project for me, or at least a project. I don't want to make it bigger than it needs to be project for me in the next two to three years.

I would like to do more in the visual medium. Alright, there's a recommendation from Josh. Or Joshua Armstrong. Also check out Victor Frankel's Yes to Life. It's a compilation of lectures he gave before publishing Man's Search for Meaning. And I found it to be more actionable as direct advice. That is

Great advice. Joshua, so thank you. I will check that out. 'Cause I am all for actionable at the moment. Although the conceptual stuff ultimately can soak in and help with your view of the world that then informs other decisions. But

I will check out that. Collection of I guess transcribed lectures, basically. There's a question here. Any research on the effects, just to revisit this'cause it it's come up from a few people, any research on the effects of psychedelics combined with breath work, increased synergistic effect. I suspect that it depends on the compound, but absolutely

it is very common that breath work administered to people on psychedelics, and there are different versions of this, one is referred to as power breathing, has a multiplicative effect on the dose. So for instance, if we consider a normal hit of LSD to be 100 micrograms, If you were to give someone fifty micrograms and then have them do the equivalent of Wim Hof or holotropic breath work, from say after the point of administration minutes. thirty to sixty.

my expectation would be that many people would Subjectively feel it as if it were between a hundred micrograms and two hundred micrograms. So that is worth being aware of. Let's look at some other questions. And of course I'm not recommending that anyone use any illegal

compounds. So I am not a doctor, I don't play one on the internet, nor am I your lawyer. So Everything we're discussing here. is for informational purposes. Only. Okay.

Question from Debbie. Debbie Wheel or Vyl? I'm 69 married and have six grandchildren. Definitely not in your target demographic, but still a big fan. Thank you, Debbie. I appreciate that. I don't think I have a target demo. So maybe that makes everyone my target demo. So I appreciate you. being a fan. Question, why are you still hesitating about having children? I'm not hesitating about having kids, actually. I hesitated for a long time because a I wasn't convinced that I would be a good father.

And I needed to have some conviction around that before even contemplating having kids because I think it's it is inherently a selfish Choice. Or self interested choice. You're having kids because you want to have kids. Uh, as far as we know, they are not choosing. to uh have you as a parent. So I really wanted to do

a lot of self work and Go through quite a lot of therapy. many different types of therapy for childhood trauma, et cetera, before even considering that as an option. It just it seemed like the only ethical way to approach it. And uh secondly, some of my hesitation. has been around my genetic predisposition and it is a genetic predisposition. I've seen this

in my family, certainly, to depressive episodes. And whether or not I want to pass along. Genetic. Code.

that could predispose someone who didn't ask for it. to experience Depressive episodes on a regular basis. But at this point, for many reasons I am in the process. Uh

Seeing fertility docs and going through the pre flight checklist. So to speak. To ensure that all systems are go and then Think we're off to the races. So T B D on outcomes, but that is the current plan. So I am I am no longer

Hesitating in my mind. I Just a quick thanks to one of our sponsors and we'll be right back to the show. This episode is brought to you by Wealth Front. Did you know if you missed ten of the best performing days after the two thousand eight crisis, you would have missed out on fifty percent five zero percent of your returns. Don't miss out on the best days in the market. Stay invested in a long-term automated investment portfolio. Wealthfront pioneered the automated investing movement, sometimes referred to as robo advising, and they currently oversee$20 billion of assets for their clients.

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Tim. I Recommendation from Roland Jigarovs. Watch Kumare about how to become a fake shaman. This is actually excellent advice. So Anyone who is listening to this Uh, I would strongly suggest

that you watch a documentary called Kumare. I don't wanna ruin it, so just watch the trailer, K U M A R E And uh if you want to train yourself. Uh look on the bright side if you want to have a degree of optimism while simultaneously learning to defend yourself more effectively against charlatans.

This is a great documentary. It is a real fun watch and it is also one hell of a nail biter. I'll leave it at that. Bogdan Bulgarian, if that is your oh no, Bogdan the Bulgarian. What a great name. So Bogdon

I may abridge your question a little bit, but I think it's a good one and it's one that I get a fair amount or I've seen a fair amount. Here it is. You've mentioned that you believe your hard charging beat yourself up attitude actually held you back rather than helped you get ahead. Can you explain more about why you think that's the case? It seems a lot of successful people spend their twenties and thirties grinding super hard to get to where they are. And it's only once they've achieved success that they take the point of view I shouldn't have been so hard on myself. Do you think that you would have overcome all the obstacles you had if you had been more self-compassionate even in your twenties and thirties? So this is a great question. And

On one level it's impossible to answer. So I can't run a Monte Carlo simulation on my life and say If I had behaved in these different ways, reviewed myself in these other ways, that the outcomes would have been the same, or I would have reached the same degree of financial success. But I do think That

The word successful is worth underlining here. So And that is why I said financial success and I modified it in that way. Here's what I can say. Is that a lot of people who compulsively focus on professional achievement.

have demons whipping them in their back. And that There are exceptions, certainly, but many of the people who achieve outsized financial success, success in any measurable way that can be socially reinforced.

And appreciated and lauded on magazine covers and so on. Have Superpowers and equally super deficits. And that Many of them.

After making millions of dollars or billions of dollars. remain quite Tortured and unhappy. So I just want to say that as a preface. That word successful is very dangerous. So I would I would encourage everybody When you use that word successful, at the very least to throw a modifier in front of it, like financially. successful or even better financially independent or post economic or whatever the the concept is that you're seeking to describe.

To this point, I can't speak for my experience'cause I've only had the life that I've had. But There are also counterexamples. So whenever someone says I can't do or I couldn't have done X because I am Y. Or

I had to do X. Or I have to do X because I am Y. One of the first questions that I always have or that comes to mind Is are there any counterexamples? And

I could say, for instance And the the phrasing will will change. But People are successful. because financially successful, because they have a beat yourself up attitude in their twenties and thirties. That leads them to grind super hard.

Question Are there counterexamples? And there are. I actually have quite a few friends who did not self flagellate to my knowledge. And were not malicious to themselves, did not constantly focus on their flaws. Who have had

outsized financial success. So Is it necessary? No. I don't think so. Is it common?

Yes. So then the question is, should you risk it? If you're in your twenties and thirties, should you risk being self-compassionate? And uh What I would say is I see very little downside.

So if you are someone who is even asking this question. You are probably not being self compassionate, if that makes any sense. So you already have some edge. of beat yourself up attitude.

If you're even asking this question. And If I look at what I have achieved. just by adding a little bit of softness, a little bit of slowness, a little bit of spaciousness to my life through, say, meditation. Twenty minutes in the morning. That's it. Forget about self-compassion. That just gets too squishy for a lot of hard driving.

Kind of McKinsey I banker. Aspiring. folks who just, you know, wanna conquer the world. So let's not use self compassion, but what about meditating twenty minutes in the morning? This will help you to become more self aware. Let's start there. Forget about compassion. If you have the ability to pause even for a few seconds.

Before Reflexively. responding. Say in anger. Or in anything.

If you have the ability to be more self aware so that you can regulate more effectively. Will that make you more effective or will that make you less effective? I think it'll make you more effective. Yeah. These things will naturally lead, I think, to some degree of of self compassion. So if we deconstruct it that way.

I would have to say A I have yet to find someone who has cultivated Any of these behaviors. Who has said I've lost my edge

I lost my drive completely. I can't achieve anything anymore, and I really regret it. I've never met anyone who has said that. This is also true for people in their twenties. And thirties. The second thing I would say. is that

When you take the edge off a little bit. Because this is also a concern in therapy. People don't want to go to therapy because they're afraid they'll lose their edge. This is very true for people like comedians or entertainers, oftentimes, or they don't want to meditate. They don't want to journal because they might lose their edge, whatever that is. And in my experience, you don't lose your edge. You become More aware. Of

the psychological clothing you put on, the stories that you tell yourself, et cetera. that produce that edge. If that makes any sense, right? So you become aware of the recipe that you use for the edge. And you could view that like a the the analogy that I've used with with one person.

Is It's like a jacket that you take off and you put in your closet. You still have that jacket. If you need that edge, you know where to find it and you can put it back on and you can get out. And you know, you can scorch the earth or you can conquer the world, whatever it it happens to be. if somebody, for instance, like I found um a stalker came out of the woodwork and really bothered me and there was a risk that they were going to be a threat to someone in my family.

So I went into my wardrobe and I took out my killer cloak and I put it on. And I like quadrupled my edge and I was able Two Solve the problem. Uh needless to say. And then I can take off that cloak and put it back in my wardrobe. And not wear it twenty four seven.

There's a time and a place for it. But it's like a smoking jacket. That's the analogy I used with this. with this friend, I said, Like smoking jacket's cool. Great. But You wear it when you're smoking in a lounge. It's a very specific use case. You don't fucking wear it to Starbucks. You don't walk around all day in your office wearing a smoking jacket. You'd be a weirdo. And it's just not necessary. So that's a very, very long answer to your question, but hopefully that is helpful in some capacity. And here's the other thing. It's not all or nothing. It's like when uh female friends of mine say, If I lift weights, I'll get really

bulky, won't I? And I say, that's not gonna happen overnight. You're not just gonna turn into some show pony. With like Quadzillas. In forty eight hours. So Train, do some resistance training.

And it's going to be incremental. And if you don't like it, stop. Yeah, you're not gonna become a Buddhist master monk overnight if you start meditating or considering Some of these topic by reading books like Radical Acceptance or Awareness by Anthony DeMello. For instance.

There you are, Bogdan. Hopefully that is helpful. Okay. Question from John, and then we're gonna jump back into the Live stream. John says, You've covered and experimented with a number of different eating approaches. Time restricted eating, fasting, thirty grams of protein in the morning, slow carb, keto, et cetera. What's your current eating plan or schedule look like?

I'm back to slow carb. I've tried so many things and uh the slow carb diet. generally speaking, is going to be my preferred method of eating. And I'm not doing much Time restricted eating. I think that there there are, I am sure, benefits. I am sure because they're documented. There are benefits to time restricted eating. But right now I'm trying to add muscle mass and strength with a lot of the training that I'm doing. So I am not

using time restricted eating. And there are people who will say you can use time restricted eating or intermittent fasting to enhance anabolism. I just find it easier. to follow a normal more or less three meal per day slow carb diet in pursuing that. And then From a fasting perspective, I still try to do

and aim to do, say, a three day fast, meaning a seventy two hour water fast once per month, and then at least a Single one week. Fast. Per year. That is my current regimen.

And if you have not fasted before, please do so under medical supervision. Speaker. General practitioner beforehand, please, because not everyone tolerates. Fasting. Terribly well. And you can listen to my podcasts with Doctor Dominic De Agostino.

D apostrophe A G O S T I N O for all the detail in the world you could possibly want on fasting. He is One of the country's top. Experts. Yeah.

All right, that is John. And uh let's jump into the live questions here. Alright, here's a question from Daniel, any particular thinkers or writers you found very helpful regarding child rearing and preparation for fatherhood? uh obviously the general work with acceptance, self-love, et cetera, but on rearing children. So Daniel, uh honestly, I have not begun to read those books because once I let that genie out of the bottle, I'm gonna read a hundred of them.

My general feeling is Spending time with my friends who I consider to be excellent parents and excellent partners and I do look for them to check both boxes. Is

the best preparation that I can do in addition to all the self-work that you mentioned. I think that if you Try to make yourself the most compassionate aware person possible. Obviously with boundaries, I think I will be a strict parent on a lot of levels. And you trust your biology. We've been giving birth and raising children successfully for a very, very long time, well before

What to expect when you're expecting. Came out, even though I hear that's a very good book. So I'm not Overly Anxious or insecure.

About Parenting. Because I do think that a lot of switches will be flipped. uh as soon as is as really we get into the process of getting pregnant, giving birth, and so on.

But I'll keep you posted. Recommendation to Daniel. Might not be exactly what you're looking for. This is from uh another commenter, but the The book by Gabor Mate, Scattered Minds.

touches a lot of important topics on importance of early Development. Alright, let's jump back to The questions I have here in front of me. Here's one from Max. Max.

Asks, do you have any advice for dealing with ontological shock? A sudden and dramatic need to rewrite the existing narratives of your life and identity, I'm struggling with this. So Thanks, Max. I wanna take a close look at this phrase ontological shock. I first heard this

Phrase. From Roland Griffiths. at Johns Hopkins with reference to what some people some patients can experience after Their first

Mystical experience. on higher doses of something like Sul Cybon. So what is ontology? Ontology now. The branch of metaphysics dealing with the nature of being.

Two, a set of concepts and categories in a subject area domain that shows their properties and relations. Between them. It's really sort of a nature of being, a nature of knowing. This is how I think about this. The ontological shock that someone can experience in a psychedelic Session would include Being unable to reconcile New experiences of reality.

Or new experiences of non ordinary States of consciousness that seem hyper real. How do you take this experience and then reconcile it? With your normal, ordinary

way of being in the world. Turns out that it can be extremely difficult. and uh very jarring for people. Uh it can take in some instances weeks or months or years to readjust if you don't have Help. This is not something that happens all the time, but it is something that happens with some frequency. Then you have we could call it ontological shock, say, of the realization or the surfacing of memories related to childhood abuse.

Or any type of abuse or trauma for that matter. I have found a number of tools very helpful. for this I do find IFS internal family systems to be very helpful. Created by Dick Schwartz. I did a podcast episode with Dick Schwartz where we actually did a live session of IFS to really Demonstrate and showcase.

the characteristics of that method. Uh, and there are IFS therapists around the world. So I would suggest taking a look at that podcast to see if it's something that might be of interest. The next That comes to mind. And this applies in many arenas, is the work by Byron Cady.

And it's really a series of questions form of self inquiry. That allows you to Interrogate your thoughts or examine and cross examine your thoughts or beliefs. Beliefs being thoughts we take as true. So the work by Byron Cady you can find online and many worksheets and so on can be found for free.

And The the last book I'll mention quickly here. Actually, there are two. One I already mentioned, Radical Acceptance by Tara Brock, B-R-A-C. She's also been a guest on the podcast because almost all of my guests on the podcast.

Have some connection to my life, meaning I invite them on the podcast because of a personal curiosity or or a personal Challenge or personal goal. So Tarbrock has been on my podcast of that. Could serve as a teaser.

If you want to consider Radical acceptance, which is a fantastic, fantastic book. The last book that I'll mention in this particular answer is. One by Bruce Tift. T I F T The book is already free.

And the the title is worth saying twice. Already free. Subtitle Buddhism Meets Psychotherapy on the Path to Liberation. And I found this book Sho be

Akin after reading, say the first fifty to seventy five pages, to taking off a hundred pound backpack you didn't even realize you'd been carrying. And Uh I think that in combination with radical acceptance

Really offers a Synergistic. one two punch that could help a lot with many different types of ontological shock. So I will leave it at that.

And I wish you good luck. It's a difficult experience. And uh that doesn't mean it is a valueless experience. And Sometimes. We experience breakdowns so that we can experience breakthroughs. I know that sounds very cliche, but certainly I've come to believe that in my own personal experience.

Alright, I'm looking at Some additional questions now. here in the live stream. Chloe Carroll, have you finished reading Overstory yet? Yes, I finished reading the Overstory. Which is for those who don't know is a Pulischer Prize winning novel. It is incredibly good. It is incredibly long. You need to give it time

to tie the different threads together. I thought it was a beautiful book. It has certainly increased my interest in In trees, botany, plants. Which one might expect. I recommend it to everyone. It contains A lot of beauty. And a lot of brutality.

And for anyone who's read it, that'll make sense. And I think there's a tendency to shield ourselves from brutality. Uh which Makes a lot of sense, in part because it's easy to succumb to

what someone on my team called Doom Scrolling. Particularly. during COVID when every news headline, every article seems optimized to cause a panic response or a rage response. And That is I think a form of

Unfiltered. unselected brutality that is to be avoided. I that would be stress in the form of distress. Then you have stress in the form of the opposite, which is U stress EU like like euphoria. So positive stress.

Weightlifting would be an example of this. The rock climbing that I'm doing would be an example of this. These are stressors or sunlight leading to a sunpan that you want. Stressors that produce an adaptation. And I think Selecting painful truths or certain types of brutality. And becoming familiar with them.

particularly if there is the combination with beauty, as you would find in the overstory It allows you to inoculate yourself. A bit. And what I mean by that Is if you constantly shield yourself.

from the difficult, from what you perceive to be the negative. When you are For factors well outside of your control. Forced. to encounter the negative, the difficult, the destructive.

you may find that you are more fragile. You may find that you are Increasingly having trouble Withstanding The

The onslaught if you have not trained yourself in some fashion with The combination. Which you can find of beauty and brutality. way to put it. Uh, but I I do believe there's something to that.

Ricky asked me, Are you sure you're not drunk? I'm a hundred percent sure I'm not drunk. I also recorded a very long, very fun podcast. just a few hours ago. So I've I've already been talking for Say three hours today. So I think there's something to that. Everyone who's listening should try talking for six hours and then uh seeing. How they're Speech.

evolves or devolves over the day. Somebody asked when this ends. Not sure. I mean, we've gone for An hour.

I'll probably go for a little bit longer. Especially since apparently my brain function is faltering, but I will Probably go for another twenty to thirty minutes. Eh, let's call it fifteen to thirty minutes.

Just a question, what am I laughing at the most these days? Uh someone also asked about evening routines. And uh in the evening very often My catch up time with my girlfriend is Dinners. We do have date nights twice a week. And I think it's very important to block those out.

Otherwise. Life will just crowd out that time with people you care about. So we have date nights. Twice a week. One is tonight, so I will be certainly not staying on for

And then we have Hot Tub or Sana. Uh, which is just a a a great way to physically Let go. And Then we will very often watch.

A Short T V show of some type. Right now that's Shits Creek. That's Yes.

C H I T T Apostrophe S. Creek. Which is absolutely hilarious. The episodes are extremely short.

We are about, I want to say three quarters of the way through season two. And it's outstanding. It is really Well done. And the characters are All uniquely

hilarious and it's easy. It's very easy. So I would say that is one example of where I am laughing the most these days. Here's a question from Robert Metcalf. When you get into an unproductive thought or emotional loop, are there any particular practices, quotes, reminders that you return to for grounding and clear thinking? I'll be the first to confess that I get into Unproductive thought or emotional loops.

all the fucking time. Uh so if that makes anybody feel any better. Uh this is an ongoing challenge. And so it goes. That's okay. Particular practices, quotes, reminders. Practice number one would be morning pages, as described by Julia Cameron, there's the Morning Pages.

workbook that I use. It is literally on my kitchen table right now. And You can learn all about that just by searching my name. Tim Ferris and Morning Pages and I wrote an entire blog post on how I approached that. So I won't rehash it here, but that is definitely one of my go to

Practices quotes. I have a piece of wood that has a quote laser etched into it, and it's not so much a quote as a proverb. It's a Polish proverb. And it's very simple. Not my circus, not my monkeys. Now Why would I use that?

Very often because my unproductive thought or emotional loop is triggered by some bullshit that gets foisted upon me. Like a hot potato. And I would say in combination with not my circus, not my monkeys.

The expression. Your lack of preparation does not constitute my emergency. uh which was said to me once way back in the day when I was getting started because I was trying to rush someone to do something. And It is simply a reminder that if you allow everyone else's to do list to become your to-do list,

You will have a life. replete of emergencies and that just produces a daily experience. And a life of cortisol, which I don't think any of us want. Now, granted, you need cortisol. If you didn't have it, you would die, but you don't want to have A life that is dominated by stress hormones. Uh so those are a few and then

Last but not least And I know I've mentioned this already in this episode. And the fact that I will mention it again should tell you that I view it as valuable. The book Awareness by Anthony DeMello. It is a constant

Source of nourishment. with incredible after effects. I find myself really to be at peace for two to three weeks. After Reading. awareness with fresh eyes, and I always find

A new nuance. Or a new takeaway from this book, even though I've read it probably twelve times at this point, something along. Ten to twelve times, I would say minimum. I have an entire shelf in my guest bedroom at home. that is full of copies of awareness to give to friends who come to visit. And that is

How strongly I feel about the benefits. Comment from Justin Stewart. Ted Lasso is a good one too. I pulled my followers on Twitter and Facebook and so on, to a few million people. Asking for an easy

Feel good series to binge watch, and Ted Lasso, L A S S O came up repeatedly. It was probably one of the top three. Uh so that is also On My List.

And even in this chat, there are many plus ones for Ted Lasso. Matt Ridley. Ask how much time do I set aside for reading each book? Week. I tend to read before bed. as a way to wind down.

And uh very frequently I would say, you know, once or twice a week, I will try to read This is often if I am feeling anxious for whatever reason or rushed. But without a clear explanation, I will meditate. have my tear coffee, then lay down on the couch with my dog and read for thirty to sixty minutes. So I would say if you total it all up, I am probably reading

For Three to five hours. Per week. If I'm traveling, it will be significantly higher. Question here, how active are you in lobbying Congress to decrease restrictions on psychedelic research

Well There are many challenges in the arena of psychedelic research. Certainly one is the federal scheduling. Yeah. And

Suffice to say, I am active on almost Every front. related to psychedelic research. question from it looks like Greek. Unfortunately I can't read Greek phonetically, so I apologize. Have you given serious thoughts to writing fiction? Yes, I have, and in fact I have been writing short stories in fiction, and I've been doing that In the mornings.

Before inputs. Often on the weekends. And it has been uh tremendously liberating. And it is quite similar to rock climbing, in fact. And I think part of the reason I enjoy both is that

You might have an idea of where you're starting the first few moves, and then you get up on the wall. And unless you've spec'd out the entire route. you need to improvise and you begin to problem solve. And play with puzzles. On the way up.

And I quite enjoy that, which is very different from my experience of nonfiction. Nonfiction is more like For me at least, carpentry. It's a lot of research, preparation, laying out the outlines, knowing where you're going. having the data in front of you. This is uh much more similar to to playing with building blocks or finger paints or something like that, not to in any way denigrate fiction. Great fiction I find almost impossible.

to comprehend as a craft. I don't know how someone like the author of Little Big, for instance, writes the way that he writes. I just I just don't know how it's done. It really boggles my mind. But I am taking it step by step. Bird by bird, as one might say, which is

Also one of my favorite books on the craft of writing and fiction, which is really also a great book on the craft of living, Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott. Alright, I'm gonna go back. Uh and I think I am gonna wrap up in a

is clearly lagging with my slurring. And I promise you no drug involved. Maybe I need more drugs. Alright, let me take a look.

Alright, I'm gonna read This question from Andrew Robinson. Not because my answer. Is A great answer.

Although I I I think it may be helpful to some people, but it it's an important topic. So Andrew asks, How do you overcome the fear of being misunderstood? It seems that you have made many decisions in your personal and professional life. Example given, opting out of a more typical career path after Princeton, extreme experimentation, quitting startup investing, and most recently supporting psychedelic research that might be confusing at first, even for those in your personal life. Anything other than fear setting that comes to mind for helping you manage how others whether personal friends or the general public may perceive your Decisions.

So This is a topic that we could explore for an entire episode, but I do think the first principles are important because you you can come up with all sorts of strategies and tactics, but Underlying those are some assumptions or beliefs. And Those are in a sense the first principles.

So For me, I suppose there are a couple of things. To consider. That First.

You should assume you're almost always going to be misunderstood. Or I should say if You assume you will always be misunderstood because Think about how difficult it is to understand yourself. How many people listening right now can say, I understand myself perfectly? I certainly can't say that. I don't even know what understand would mean in such a context, but

There are misunderstandings left, right, and center every day. Probably every hour, every minute. Uh as we Sit here. Engaging.

in this live Q and A, certainly. And If we then just assume That Understanding. As a concept.

is sort of hard to wrap our heads around with a lot. And that even if we could wrap our heads around it. We're going to be constantly misunderstood. That removes a lot of the pressure. To make yourself understood. If that makes any sense. So if the secret to happiness is low expectations As I was told by one of my Danish friends when I asked them why

Denmark rated as one of the happiest countries on earth. Then perhaps the key to overcoming the fear of being misunderstood is just to assume that everyone misunderstands everyone. And that there is no point that it is pissing in the wind.

To try to do it. to prevent people from misunderstanding you. Uh so that's point number one. Uh point number two. Is

That we dramatically overestimate how much people are thinking about us. People Think about themselves. Most of us.

Spend the vast majority of our time In the Mee Me movie. Where we are the lead actor or actress. Everyone else is supporting cast. And we are ruminating.

And perseverating on all sorts of nonsense. We occasionally stumble upon something important, but mostly Think about trivialities related to our own lives, our own goals, our own fears, what other people might be thinking. Even though, in truth.

Everyone else is also in there on Solo act. And that I think can be tremendously freeing. When you assume that everyone else is

Your family, closest friends, et cetera. are also somewhat compulsively self referential And thinking about themselves most of the time. They're just not thinking about you most of the time.

And that can be instead of being depressing. Very, very uh uplifting and reassuring. So you can feel Free in a sense. To do what

You believe. The next right thing is because Doesn't really matter. They're not thinking about you. At least it doesn't matter on that level. You can also focus on

communication and expressing needs and expressing your motivations Without attachment to the response that comes. And that takes Practice. I've been very fortunate.

To have felt a lot of support. Not necessarily for every decision. But I felt support for Marching to the beat of my own drummer.

If that makes any sense. So Those are a few thoughts related. Yeah. Not overcoming the fear.

of being misunderstood, but reframing The fear of being Misunderstood. R. Helpful.

Read. Make good art or better yet, watch the commencement speech Make Good Art by Neil Gaiman. Yeah. G-A-I-M-A-N. And it it doesn't address this perfectly, but it speaks to vulnerability. And I think that vulnerability Whether it's a fear or vulnerability.

Or a wish to be more candid with those around you. That is the connective tissue between those two. Recommendations. I Think

That Is gonna be it, guys. I think I'll take a quick look At some of the questions. that we have in the live stream, but I I think I think this is probably good. I think this is probably good. I think it's time for me to maybe go get some exercise. Ha ha ha

Here's a complimentary comment. From someone. I saw a bumper sticker that goes Don't worry about what other people think, they don't do it very often. Exactly. That summarizes uh one of the key points I was trying to make.

Very, very succinctly. And then a question on sleep. Take a stab at this. Tips, resources, hacks for improving sleep. So I have written about sleep quite extensively.

in Tools of Titans. I'll mention just a few things. California poppy is very helpful. For me, at least. with sleep and I do not want to take melatonin.

On a daily basis. I just do not feel good about Taking things that consistently that affect Hormones. uh without cycling off. So I will use melatonin occasionally, although it often leaves me feeling groggy. There are people who will take, say, phosphocyl serine, if your head tends to

Spin or remain very active. when you're trying to go to sleep, there are some people who will take phosphatidyl serine otherwise known as P S, uh, which I did take, say, last night before bed. The

Or I should say lower the release of cortisol, which then can result in spikes in blood glucose. So those are a couple of supplemental Interventions. Magnesium L three anate. is a version of magnesium that is preferentially

absorbed in the brain, that can also be Quite interesting. But the greatest determinant of sleep quality I should say determinants for me are A

Restricting caffeine intake. in time to before Midnight. Because the

quarter life of caffeine is about 12 hours, which means if you consume, say, 100 milligrams of caffeine, Or two hundred milligrams, but let's go with a hundred because it makes the math simple. a quarter of that will still be present twelve hours later. So if you have A hundred milligrams of caffeine. That would be one Vivarin.

at noon, you will still have 25 milligrams of that caffeine in your system. Uh roughly obviously we're dealing with averages here. At midnight. Okay, so so minimizing caffeine. intake in volume and then also in time, I think is a huge, I know is a huge determinant of sleep quality because I track my sleep quality with something like

the aura ring. I do wear the aura ring, O-U-R A, which I I find to be extremely helpful to establish your baseline and then look at what interventions actually do to your sleep quality and types of sleep. Yeah. Uh, that is phases of sleep. And Second is exercise and sun exposure. So when in doubt, just get more exercise and sun exposure before lunch and without fail, that will increase my

Sleep quality in terms of percentage of say restorative deep sleep and also speed. to sleep, that is the onset of sleep. And last is temperature. So one modification that I would make to what I wrote in Tools of Titans is I now use A

Cover on my bed from eight sleep. which I find to be tremendously helpful. for both Speed to sleep. and quality of sleep. So temperature

is really one of the primary levers that I like to pull. So I I sleep as cold as I can Without suffering. And that solves all sorts of relationship issues and potential strife around fighting over the thermostat also. So there are many many benefits to using something like the eight sleep.

bed cover which which I do. So those are a few recommendations. that you could consider playing with, but you need to be able to certainly Evaluate. whether or not your interventions are working. You could do that subjectively, how you feel, certainly, but some metrics will be helpful. And that is where something like the aura ring comes into play and can be combined with a device like Aidsleep, which also offers some metrics and markers.

On a nightly basis. And with all that said... There's a question here, I'm gonna leave it as a cliffhanger. There's a question about how I learned Japanese through judo textbooks and so on. Confusingly the four hour chef. This book that I wrote, which was the hardest book to put together, is in fact. A

Book. about accelerated learning and it goes into how I used these textbooks and how I deconstructed characters for Japanese in some length. So I'll I'll leave it to people to explore the four hour chef if they want to dig more deeply into that. And it talks about accelerated learning not only for factual knowledge or declarative knowledge like memorizing character and foreign vocabulary and so on, but also procedural knowledge, skills.

Shooting a basketball or any Thousands of other things, knife skills in the kitchen, et cetera. So all of those things are deconstructed with a framework, D I S S S and CAFE. And those are two frameworks that you can apply to learning just about any skill. I have not found any exceptions. So With that.

Thank you, everyone, for joining. It's been really fun. To Connect with everybody. on this live QA. I hope you found

Some of it or any of it valuable. And uh I wish everyone a wonderful week. And a wonderful weekend. And uh take care. And take care means not just take care of other people, but take care of yourselves.

If You are. Cultivation of compassion does not include yourself. Then it is incomplete, as my friend Jack Cornfield would say. And until next time.

Have fun, be safe, and thanks for tuning in. Hey guys, this is Tim again. Just a few more things before you take off. Number one, this is Five Bullet Friday. Do you want to get a short email from me? Would you enjoy getting a short email from me every Friday that provides a little morsel of fun before the weekend? And Five Bullet Friday is a very short email where I share the coolest things I've found or that I've been pondering over the week. That could include favorite new albums that I've discovered. It could include gizmos and gadgets and all sorts of weird shit that I've somehow dug up in the world of the esoteric as I do. It could include favorite articles that I've read and that I've shared with my close friends, for instance. And it's very short. It's just a

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