Transcript
How to hijack attention: Lessons from jingles, candy crush, and betting sites
All right, I've got a thing I want to fill you in on. And This is something I've been thinking about lately. And I think that you actually you're gonna bring more application to this topic than I am. And so it's my theory, but I want to hear how you would apply this idea that I have.
All right, hit me. So did you see that blonde haired woman? She had that song that was like looking for a man in finance. Six four, whatever. Yeah, what was it? What was it? Blasphemy. Six five, bro. Six five. Finance five. Six five, yeah. Blue eyes or whatever. Dude, have I seen that? Has there been ten minutes in my house where either me or my daughter is not singing that song? My four year old daughter, by the way, hits very different when your daughter says it. My dad hormones kicked in and I was like, You ain't looking for what are you looking for? You're looking for your Barbie, your toys. Get you're looking for Legos, is what you're looking for.
I feel like I can rule the world I know why Be what I want to There was really funny follow ups where people are like, Let's do the math on that, by the way. How many men are are six five? It's like point one percent. How many people live in New York City? How many have a trust fund? And it was like You know, and they're single. It was like seven guys left. Yeah. Yeah. It's pretty funny. But that got me thinking.
And before I tell you exactly what it is, I have to ask you a question. Do you know? Your mother's Or fathers. Cell phone number by heart.
I do not. So for the life of me, I couldn't tell you my wife's phone number. I could tell you the the area code. But I couldn't tell you her number. Which is like a big deal. However How many commercials
From the nineties. Do you remember? I want my baby back, baby back, baby back. I want my baby back. Yeah. Or uh Ha pocket. Like you remember some of these songs. Five dollar. Five dollar. We know what we know what comes after after that. I don't even have to have known you, right? You could be a complete stranger, but if I'm like five dollar, five dollar, the guy's gonna say footlong at the end of that. So I got really interested in jingles. Because I don't remember my wife's phone number. You don't remember your parents' phone numbers.
But I can cite all these jingles. In fact I follow Instagram accounts where it's like commercials from the nineties. The nineties at because that's when we were kids. And for a lot of listeners. That was the heyday.
of these jingles and commercials. And In my opinion. We need to bring that back. And I wanna tell you I'll give you a little little bit, a short history of of jingles. So in the nineties
Something like fifteen percent of commercials. Had jingles. Now it's closer to one percent. So in the twenties This company called General Mills came out with this thing called Wheaties, Wheaties cereal.
And it wasn't that big of a hit early on. And so they were like, Let's write a song about it and we're gonna create a commercial on the radio for Wheaties. And it's the first time that there was ever a dedicated commercial. For a product. And the Weedies wasn't really doing that well for the first three or four years. That song comes out in year five or so, it takes off.
And now Wheaties is like a huge brand that we all know. And I just I I think that we need to do more of that. In the nineties, it kind of kicked ass because when we were kids, there was what, like fifty or sixty channels. So there was less channels. And the key To a jingle sticking.
And like is something remember is you need to hear it. Tons and tons of times. So when the Wheaties commercial came out. They ended up playing this uh song something like three hundred times a day on a variety of radio stations and and back then there weren't actually that many radio stations. And so repetition is important. However, once YouTube, Facebook, Whatever it came about, we have so many different channels.
However When you run Facebook ads, you can Increase. the repetition, the frequency, I think they call it, right? You can increased frequency. And so you can see like, am I hitting the same person twenty, thirty, fifty times?
A lot of times with ads, it's just a photo, right? It's usually a photo for like there's little silly trends like for a long time. It was Pointing an arrow at something. Or Zoom in on someone's face. There's like little silly trends that you'll see one successful brand do, everyone copies them. Yeah, one we had was we would write the ad in the notes app on iPhone, take a screenshot of that. So it looked like someone was sharing a screenshot from notes, but it was actually just an ad.
Yes. And I remember reading or seeing the short video. It was launched yeah at Sundance actually. It was like a featurette. In two thousand sixteen, maybe you saw this. But it was about people who have Alzheimer's. And they were like really bad. You know, they're elderly of Alzheimer's and
They they were just out of it all the time. And so these these doctors played music. that the the people would have listened to when they are in their twenties and thirties. And all of a sudden it clicks. And they start singing the song and they're like, Oh, I remember this song, I was
In the army doing this or whatever. And that's when I met my wife and then and then they like have The next three, four, five minutes are like speaking normal. And It kinda like made me realise
Music is really important. for that reason, but particularly for advertising brands and products. And I've been trying to think about What does a jingle have that makes it Work.
And so I have it down to a few things. And this is a little bit for the modern day jingle, what it needs. The first thing that I think it needs is it needs a little bit of cringiness. I think with ads We be like this needs to be cool.
Like it needs to be a little bit overly cringe. That's the second thing that you have to have is It has to be incredibly repetitive. For example, do you remember that song? Don't you wanna Fanta, Fanta. Yeah. Don't you wanna like you need to say the brand many, many, many times. Like Chiquita Banana. Yeah, so the Chiquita Banana ad is actually interesting. So that ad, it was like a sexy banana dressed up as like a Cuban lady dancer, and she was like singing. and dancing and it was all and it was all about when do you know a banana is ready to eat.
And so she was thinking about like you can you should peel me back when you see a little bit of brown, like whatever. It it it was kinda like sexualized and awesome. And that ad would play hundreds of times a day. It was awesome. I love when people sexualize stuff, by the way. My friend Neville had a had an ad for why you should buy this set of font from him and he was like When I whisper Geranda
Does it make you weak in the knees? If so, this is for you. And so I love when they do that. And then the last thing you need is a call to action. So do you remember the song where it's like Call J G Wetworth. Eight seven seven cash now. Do you remember that song? Yeah, you can remember full phone numbers when it comes to uh a jingle, right? You you started this by saying can't remember your your wife or your mom's number. But we can remember some company's phone number, one eight hundred, whatever, if they put it in a jingle. And so
This whole kind of rant is I think we need to bring them back. Now the problem is is that I don't exactly have like a consumer brain to do this on. You do, and you work a little bit more consumer stuff. W why can't you do this for Hampton, by the way? I could. And I should. So that was a bullshit. Yeah, thank you.
Do you see this working with your stuff in consumer? Well I would say in theory, I'm all there with you. As in. Jingle's work is a n is a non debatable statement. Would jingles work for my brand? Well, why not? Jingles work, so we're back to swear one.
Do jingles still work? Yeah, I'm pretty sure it still works. I think you might have to tweak the form factor, maybe make it a little shorter or whatever. You know, like uh McDonald's like what they do now is they have their whole commercial and then it's I'm loving it. Right. Just they just hit that at the end as like a little five second hook at the end, which was shorter than maybe how how jingles used to be, where it was Much more of the whole commercial.
So I think there's maybe some tweaks that people are doing to him. But they they for sure still work. So I'm with you. And I'm also with you that I'm surprised. That they've declined. Because the
Brain has not changed. In fact there's a I think people call it. the phonic loop or something like that, the phonetic loop. I forgot that how they probably but it's like the the people who study the brain and the ear. And there's like neurologists, there's even somebody called like a musicologist. They're basically try to figure out why is it that when we teach kids, that they learn easier through nursery rhymes.
Yeah, there's like a nursery rhyme. To like learn your your home address. Like have you ever seen those? Dude, I could tell you Caracas, Venezuela, Lima, Peru, right? I could tell you like the capitals of South America that I haven't thought about in 30 years. But when I was six years old, some teacher taught us a song, right? Or all of the states, right? The I could teach my daughter the states. Much faster than I could teach her. Numbers because
I could turn it into a song. And so There's something in this, right? And I think they call it earworms. It's basically the what they call it when the a small Repetitive. snippet of a song or a slogan or a jingle.
Just get stuck in your ear. Right. And and it that's called an earworm. And so Using this to improve recall, improve memory And even make your brand associated with something that's kind of fun or upbeat or positive.
Definitely has value. Now the question is why why don't I or you or any of us kind of modern marketers use this? And I think really most people would say, Well it doesn't work anymore, the form fac form factor change, people got over it, blah, blah, blah. I don't think any of that's true. I think it's just like fashion. I think it's marketing fashion trends. I think it's out of out of vogue right now. And as soon as somebody brings it back in, it will become a thing again. Remember Dat Piff, that was where like mixtapes were. It was like rappers. So th this was I it was like a little Wayne would put out like a wrap a day.
On depth. And he would just turn these suckers out. I think You need a certain creative type of person to be able to do this. But we can definitely churn these out.
in a relatively fast way and see what works, which is different. Than a commercial. But one of the reasons why I think it went away is so the things that you and I liked when we were nine or eight years old, by the time we're fifteen to twenty five, that's like that's lame. That's no longer cool. But then we get in our thirties and we're like, Oh, I remember that. That was awesome. You know, that was so cool. Like It's kind of like the feeling that you get when you see a surge, like a surge drink, like a soda. You're like, Oh, I remember that. That was so awesome. I remember that as a kid, and you get like this nostalgia.
And so I think what we can do Is look at all of the past things that worked well with the brands that we liked when we were younger. I really think you can replicate'em within like the the law and actually not copy.
And the reason I think that is because The five dollar footlong. Song and McDonald's songs. They're coming back. And so they're reusing a lot of these songs now.
Because once your customer base is a bit older, you can reuse the same stuff and it becomes cool again because it's nostalgic. I'm subscribed to My First Million on YouTube. There we go. Well, we can work shop that. If you want your ad to be memorable, which we all do. Then using one of the most sticky things, which is like a a jingle. It's comp it compresses Several things together, right? A feeling
A positioning, right? Five dollar foot long. Nationwide is on your side, right? Like compresses a a position plus a a feeling. Into Four seconds, five seconds, seven seconds, and in a package that is now Easily transmissible, right? You can sing it, you can hum it, you can t sell tell it to another person.
As well as Um sticks with you. So like of course that's a that's a good thing if you can do it. I got something that's kind of interesting, totally different angle, but I think you'll like it. Are you familiar with polymarket? Is it is it gambling for crypto? Well, that's one way of looking at it. It's a prediction market. Which is sort of in the Aoli Manes situation with gambling and uh you know, reframing gambling, but
It actually is a Way to go. Bet on a prediction. That you believe will happen. So if I go to Polymarket right now, I'll see The top bet.
Two two hundred thirty seven million dollars has been bet on who will be the winner of the twenty twenty four presidential race. And right now Trump is a sixty one percent Bep Joe Biden, nineteen percent.
It you know odds. Kamala is ten percent, et cetera. And so you could see for any idea you have. that there's there there could be a betting market for it. So like, you know, you can go to sports and right now the I think the Euro
Soccer cup is happening right now. And Spain is the top. top favorite bet with thirty four percent. Or you can bet on Wimbledon right now. But you can also put in like scientific things. Like there's a bet right now. What will be the June twenty twenty four temperature increase?
And it's like, you know, more than one point oh nine, less than one point oh nine, you know, it you can bet on Will this hurricane hit the United States, yes or no? And right now that bet has played out where like if you click it, you can see that when it started, it only had an eighteen percent chance of yes. Night right now it's a ninety nine percent chance, which means it's about to hit or almost certainly hit. So that bet has played out or playing out right now. And you could see the top betters. So there's a guy named Revenge Tour nineteen eighty four, who's bet two point three million dollars this week. No, I don't I don't know if it's that weak. I think it's uh
It says top volume this week. Okay, maybe maybe it is. His if you go to his profile, so he's the top better on the platform right now. So he's got one point six nine million. One point six six million uh In bet's place, basically. Positions that are out there. He's got a P L where where his profit and loss is he's up about a million dollars so far on polymarket. And he's traded a hundred sixty nine million dollars worth of
of bets. So like right now, for example, he's got a bet out. Um Will JD Vance win the twenty twenty four Republican VP nomination? He bet it when it was at six cents. It's currently at thirty one cents. He could just sell that position today. And bank the profit. even though it hasn't happened yet. So you can win even if your thing doesn't win, as long as the odds go up.
So a couple of years ago I got on Polymarket and I got really addicted to this thing. Every day I was going and I basically had like A ten thousand dollar slush fund. that I was just betting on Polymark. And I think I ended up making Five or six grand and then I cashed out because
Now you can't do it in the United States. they like ruled against it, basically. So all of this volume, this They're doing about. fifty million a month in volume. Which is huge.
Probably The most popular crypto app right now is PolyMarket. And so They've done four hundred million this year in betting volume. So they're on pace for almost a billion dollars of betting volume this year. What did you bet on? I used to bet on all kinds of things. So I would bet on like tech stuff. So you could bet like will Tesla stock be above this price in July on July thirty first? It's like easier than buying the stock was just to go and bet, do you think it'll be here? Or will they announce
This at this time. I was betting on sports stuff. So I would bet just like a game. Oh, there's a game on a Tuesday night and I could just bet here easier than I could bet. You know, out of sports book'cause The way this thing worked was you would just sign in with your MetaMask wallet. You didn't have to do KYC. You didn't have to do a bunch of things. Who makes the odds? There's no but there's no odds maker. So this is like a uh what's called a um automated market maker. So basically the The bet gets created.
And then It's based on the betting volume. So if more people start betting no, then the odds of no go down because that's a more popular bet. If everybody thinks yes, then buying yes will have less upside for you. Most of these don't work like an order book. There's not a buyer and seller. It's a It's the same way that a lot of the The DEXs work or the uh NFT platforms work where
It's it's a AMM. A lot of the bets are weird. So will Taylor Swift be pregnant in two thousand twenty four? Yeah. Thirty thirty percent chance, right? Or something like that? Uh twenty one percent chance. Will Andrew Tate be found guilty of human trafficking in twenty twenty four? But then there's weird things. Like will Trump say the word Mog in two thousand twenty four. I don't know what that word is, M O G But Can't he just say that then and win the bet?
And So that's one of the controversies of Betting markets is that Uh okay, the easy example is oh wow, if I'm Trump. I could theoretically go place a big bet.
And then Just say the word. But there's a couple of problems with that. One. The more I like let's say something like that, it probably has very thin volume. So for example, uh twenty four thousand dollars. Yeah, twenty four thousand dollars. So if he went and tried to bet a hundred thousand dollars, he would swing the odds himself to yes to the point where it wouldn't really be worth it. There's not much action on the other side. So you the basically the yeses win the money from the no's. And the no's win the money from the yeses, depending on how the bet plays out, right? There's no
There's no third party that's involved. So You would have to do it in one of these that has like really big volume. If you wanted to make a lot of money. It says uh will Travis Kelsey go for rank number four and get engaged this year. Exactly. Uh there's you know, Elon tweets. How many tweets will we have this month? There's uh will tick will TikTok get banned in the US in twenty twenty four. Right now, only eight percent chance. So if you thought that TikTok was gonna get banned, if you're Pelosi. You could go and start betting, yes, but that bet only has twenty nine thousand of volume, so you can't bet too much, you can't make too much of a profit on something like that.
the controversy, the thing that people have always said about prediction markets is that prediction markets become assassination markets. Meaning If there was a bet that like will this person win or will this person live? And let's say there was hundreds of millions of dollars on the line, you've inadvertently created a giant bounty. to go and assassinate somebody. And this is the one of the one of the controversies around
prediction markets is that it could become um you know problematic in that way. But these are not new. Like crypto is a new way of doing it. But these have been around for a long time, like historically.
People felt that prediction markets were more accurate than uh polls, right? So let's say you wanted to say, you know, who's gonna win the election? They would go to a poll, you have a very small sample size. People might say one thing and then do another, which is like what happened with uh when Trump won I think twenty sixteen was He was um
polling far less than he than what actually happened when people people went to the ballot booth because they didn't want to admit where the where they stood. Whereas prediction markets because you're putting money on the line It's just more predictive. It's more accurate versus just general polling. And so this used to be a really popular thing. There was, in fact, even like
On the stock market, you could go and bet this way. Wall Street was like a hub for Uh for prediction bets. But then after World War Two, there was kind of a social stigma around it. Newspapers stopped quoting it and they they shift it to poles, but I think the I think it's swinging back.
where we're gonna go away from polls and back to prediction markets. And so my prediction. This whole thing is that Polymarket is gonna be massive. That Um
In this presidential election, it's gonna have just like a huge run up this year because already you can see that when everybody when anybody is writing about the odds of something about let's say the election. They're referencing polymarket and they're embedding polymarket in their articles. They're doing so now, or you think it's already happening. It's already happening. It's why it's got this huge surge. I think a couple of months ago they had uh over a hundred million embedding volume. And it was because
It's made for TV. It's made to be embedded in articles. And in fact, I think they should take this further and make their little Their little bedding widget. much easier to share and much easier to embed inside of articles, inside of news news things. So because they're going to need to quote What the predictions are around interest rates, around presidential uh stuff.
Just gonna continue to grow that way. And so I think Polymarket is actually sort of a media company, a decentralized media company where It has really interesting data that every other media company is gonna want to reference. And that's gonna just drive this surge. And they've also had just really viral bets. So right now one of the the viral bets is obviously the presidential election stuff, but when remember when the idiots went down to the Titanic and the submersible? That was one of the most viral bets. I think they had like 60 million dollars bet on that one thing.
of like what's gonna happen with the submersible. So you know, th they they can go viral. Like just yesterday it had five million in volume. And so business is booming for polymarket. Who started it and when did it start? This guy Shane, uh Shane Coplin, I think is his name. And
He started in twenty twenty. So this is not a very old business. This, you know, pretty pretty recent, three, four years it's been out. And um He I think it's like his first thing. He his LinkedIn when I was on it earlier was like he was an intern at Rap Genius. He was an intern at some other place, and then he created Polymarket. He's been doing that for four years now. Do they raise money? Yeah, they just raised a big round. So it was pretty
It was pretty under the radar and actually sort of Um You know, seemed sort of sketchy before. Like when I was betting on it, people I remember tell like were telling me, like, what are you doing, dude? You You put real money onto this thing? And I was like, Yeah, it's awesome. And they're like, Who runs this? Is this legal? I was like, I I don't really know. You know, I I'm not sure. It just it looked like a very thin
Thin app at the time. But they just raised seventy five million dollars from Founders Fund and Joe Gebia and Vitalic and a whole bunch of other heavy hitters. And so it's obviously become a lot more Legitimized. I hate
talking about gambling because I'm like I don't want to sound like my farts don't smell type of guy or what like I'm better But I am because I hate gambling. Like I don't I don't like gambling and I don't particularly love products that make it more popular. Which is weird because I have vices. Like I love nicotine and shit like that. So I would be bummed if no one made that stuff.
But I feel weird making this more popular. Do you know what I mean? I Understand. I don't know. Obviously, I enjoy betting. I bet on many things. I have a bit of a betting problem, I would say, is the honest explaining it. It's like porn. We consume it, but we're like. You know, that's disgusting that you would do this for a living. That's disgusting. Yeah. So but but I I I think there is actually a lot of value in this. So I think that the wisdom of the crowds has always been a phenomenon I've been interested in.
And I think it's just a more pure form of information. Like I think that It is very easy for the news to tell you one thing or random polls to be quoted and claimed. Like I like things that are more ground truth and I I I don't know, like more ground truth is a actual betting market on something. That is what people actually believe. And the wisdom of the crowd, it is very hard to beat the w the wisdom of the crowds.
When it comes to betting. I don't I don't know if I buy that yet, mostly because I'm ignorant to these predictive markets. In two thousand and sixteen What did whatever existed before polymarket, what did it say about the election?
Um, it wasn't as popular back then. So they there's been like Augur and a couple of other crypto prediction markets, but They were never mature enough. They didn't have enough volume. Or the people that consume the world only crypto degenerates. And so only crypto degenerates. Skewed one way. It's almost more like a pole in that case. So I'm not sure what they said then.
All I know is that All of the polls were wrong, five thirty eight was wrong, all of this sort of like data science around polling. was so wrong during that. And I know that also that the other Unrelated data point is that One of the things that help FTX take off.
Back then was Sam Bakeman Freed was one of the first to put Political bets. on his platform, I think in twenty twenty. And it was a big accelerant for FTX was um letting people bet on election
election information back then. And people around the world wanted to bet. And so it was a way to attract a lot of liquidity to FTX at the time. What was his like philosophy? SPS philosophy. It was like what was it called? Altruism?
Yeah, effective altruism. But doesn't him having betting on his website go against that? No, no, no. Effective altruism doesn't mean no s no sin, no vice. Effective altruism basically means Make as much money as you can. The the highest impact way to give and contribute to the world is to
First Like do something that's gonna accumulate a huge amount of capital so you can reallocate it. By getting them addict like addicted to things that they spend all their money. Right. You're more you are more value. Like you you have two choices. You could go work for a nonprofit. Or go volunteer in a soup kitchen and pour pour soup every day, but that's a pretty low leverage way to give to contribute.
versus if you become a billionaire and you give a w give away a billion You have done more good that And so effective altruism is basically working for the purpose of accumulating as much capital to give away as possible. Now, in his case, he turned out to be you know, a liar and a fraud on many accounts, right? So it's not I think he sort of tanked the brand of effective altruism, which probably is a little unfair.
He also tanked the brand of crypto, which is a little unfair. People are like, oh, crypto is a scam. It's like, no, this dude scammed crypto. He tricked He lied to the crypto community. Basically, he was taking money and not like you know, somebody would go try to buy Bitcoin on his platform. And instead of buying Bitcoin He would just tell them it but he bought, take the money and do something else with it altogether. He was he was deceitful is very different than than saying crypto is deceitful.
The New York Times had this podcast the other day about this woman who got addicted to draft kings or fan duel or what I I think they're the same thing. And what she told us story about how she was like a hundred and fifty thousand dollar year earner. And she got addicted to it. And w the one of the reasons why she got addicted to it was A
As an addict, whatever. But B They assign a an account manager. To you. Just like you do when you want to upsell software. And they're like, Hey, I see you're uh spending on this.
We've got this new game called this, this, and this. I'm willing to give you like a five hundred dollar credit. in order to get your uh you can wet your whistle a little bit and and try this out. And she was like telling the story. And I I'm listening to this. I'm like, hey, that's the same tactics we we did to like get people to buy ads. Like you like say like hey, you know, you're a new customer, we'll hook you up this time and hopefully you get addicted to us. You want to give us more money. But they were doing that with this woman when she was in she eventually got into three hundred fifty thousand dollars of debt. And she Well so sh she got divorced, it was like a whole issue.
And she was like, They're still like I I they're still sending me emails trying to get me to like try these new games. And I wanna try'em so bad. Like they sound so awesome. Uh and so it kinda this whole online gambling thing. kinda left a bad taste in my mouth, particularly because now you watch I UFC's the only sports way. Same thing happens in like, you know. bunch of different fields, but also just
The entire mobile gaming market. Things that look very harmless. Candy crush. These all these game all the mobile gaming companies work the same way. They're all hunting for whales. The whole business is you go try to acquire a hundred thousand users. You're looking for the few users that are gonna spend a hundred thousand dollars inside your app. Are people doing that with games where they spend a hundred grand?
Of course. Yeah. This I mean Candy Crush and and the the entire m like casual mobile gaming thing that's looks like these silly Inocuous free to play games. They're based on there's w you know women in the Midwest who are gonna dump tens of thousands of dollars into each game that they get hooked on. And those are what they work for. They work for Wales. They're trying to find Wales. Whales is obviously the most profitable customer. And in that you can't even win anything, right? It's not even like gambling where there's nothing to there's no there's money there's no money to be made in it. It's just money to be spent.
You had friends of the gaming industry, or uh or at least you knew'em better than my friends uh who work in the gaming industry. How many times did they say they had a customer that would spend fifty or a hundred thousand dollars on a game. We've been having time. That's like I guess how how big is the scale of of People willing to spend that much.
It's very large, dude. This is I mean, this is how they make these games make like a billion dollars in revenue. So they're gonna be a little bit more. I thought it was like everyone buying like a twenty dollar a month thing. No. It's Most players spend nothing, right? Vast majority of players will spend nothing. Then there's a segment of people that are gonna spend a small amount. And there's a very small segment of people that are gonna spend a huge amount and the total thing blends together where you're like, Oh, our our pre our average revenue per customer is seven dollars or ten dollars, but it's not Every custom spends seven to ten dollars. It's a
Most spend zero. A few will spend twenty three dollars on average, and then a few will spend twenty three thousand dollars, right? That's more of how it how it looks when you look at the distribution of these things. That's insane. Ben used to work at FanDuel and he was like, Yeah, dude. Part of the program I had. I think he was like employee thirty or forty at at FanDuel. He's like, you know, I basically oversaw this program or he was like a associated with some program that was like the whale VIP white glove service. It's like
Oh, if you're betting and losing this much money or winning or even winning, you it's just you'll eventually lose it. So if you're betting a certain volume Guess what? We it's the Super Bowl. We wanna fly you out. You're gonna you're gonna come visit. Hey, we're in New York, we wanna invite you to this private dinner. And there's a whole VIP program, white white glove program, where Hey, we got your tickets to this game. And they're gonna make you feel like a rock star.
Uh, there's a bunch of other degenerates sitting around the dinner table like, Hey, what do you want to bet that the meal's gonna be chicken? Yeah, and these are willing participants. These are adults. Now I I I I would say obviously Some people ruin themselves. They get addicted to gambling, just like people get addicted to everything, social media and drugs and vape and uh you know, there's a ton of things that people get addicted to and it's not good for them. I I definitely agree with that. That is that is for sure a thing and you will always see News about that.'Cause A it's happening and B it's
Makes for good news. big company ruined this person's life, right? That's always gonna be a thing. Guess what? Robin Hood is designed the same way. Robin Hood is literally designed like a mobile game. To get you addicted to trait. get you to try to trade as much as you can. They make money every time you make a trade.
They don't make money by you buying a low cost index fund and holding it for twenty years. They make money by getting you to buy Robin Hood gold to trade options and be day trading. And so Robin Hood, which is this like name of like the we're gonna steal from the rich and give to the poor is doing the exact opposite. It's basically steal from the dumb and give to themselves. And and that's that's what Robin Hood is. So
I'm gonna place a bet on this. I'm gonna uh that's what I'm saying. I'm gonna bet that Jessica Bieber's gonna be having a baby boy. You can't you're in the US you're not gonna be able to make a bet. You can't and how do they How do they how do they track that? I think it's just like your IP address right now. I I don't know what else they do. Yeah, this is horrible and awesome. I like this one. I can't believe this exists. That's pretty wild.
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All in one. So check out Wander. They have so many cool locations. I'm taking one trip on Wander in about a month or so to Tahoe. They have a really cool property there, but go to wander.com slash MFM. And just browse. You can just see like really amazing places to stay that make for great family trips or even like corporate off sites are great because these locations are so baller. So check this out. And if you go to water.com slash MFM, you can enter in to get a free trip giveaway. So they're g they're giving away a trip to one listener, as well as if you download the app, you get three hundred dollars of free travel credit. So that's pretty awesome. So check it out. Wanna.com slash M F M. All right. What do you want to do? One more thing. What do you got? Okay, I want to do one thing. You said something earlier about jingles, catchy things. And uh I was sitting in a meeting.
And I was sitting in a meeting and there was somebody who was prolific. Like if uh Kendrick Lamar Wore a suit. And sold B to B software? That was this guy. This guy had lyrics. He was lyrical with his corporate slang and it got me thinking.
About Epic corporate slang and some of my favorite greatest hits of corporate slang. And I just started thinking You know, we need some more. And so I wanted to play a little game with you. So I'd like to play a game. I texted you this. I said I want you to think of this.
Think of corporate slang that doesn't exist. But it should. Because we're innovators here on the podcast and I wanna come up with some slang. I think it would be a a a fun claim to fame if we could just make something stick. Uh, with Corpus Lang. So I I say we go back and forth like a rap battle.
With This is corporate slang that doesn't exist, but it should. All right. You have more than me. I didn't re I I I came with about four or five. You you have a bunch of them. This is right in your wheelhouse. So let's see what we can do though. All right, let me get my phone. All right. So the first one is gonna be uh the first one.
One man's Thanksgiving is another man's Thursday. And this is for any situation. Where You are uh when somebody's really excited about something That you to you is just
normal or even lame. But hey, it's their Thanksgiving. It might just be Thursday to you, but it's their Thanksgiving. So it's kind of a way to throw shade in our corporate setting. when somebody is overly excited about something that's actually just normal or average. And you just say, Hey man One man's Thanksgiving is another man's Thursday. And you just plant that seed and you just leave it with them. And they'll realize later that they just they just had chain thrown at them.
And that's a phrase that you need to use. And when someone is like, Wait, what? And you're like, Well, you don't know what that means? You don't uh Yeah, like Yeah, like when I was a kid, I thought it was uh Go out there and break an egg. Not go out there and break a leg. You know what I mean? So we'll make that a phrase. Or uh instead of cat like reflexes. I thought it was Cadillac reflexes.
Uh These are just um like stutters that you had. Yeah. Yeah. So I used to say for years like you'll go out there, have fun, break an egg. Uh so that we that's how you need to use this phrase. Um all right, I have got one.
Bubble wrap. As in when someone like do you have any employees that are overly sensitive and when you bring news to them You have to Be like, how are we gonna phrase this?
So it's like we gotta like we gotta bubble wrap this. Yeah. Like We have to We have to tell this guy about this thing, but we got to bubble wrap his ass and we gotta bubble wrap this phrasing and we gotta figure out how we can deliver this so it doesn't like totally crush him instead of just saying, uh, hey, we're not doing that anymore. Your idea sucked. We gotta bubble wrap it.
Okay, so it's actually like a uh It's like I like what you're saying. You're right. But we're gonna need to bubble wrap that before it goes out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So you have to say it in a more sensitive way, not to uh freak uh a particular person out because that person, when you talk to them, You gotta bubble wrap them before you talk to them.
So we're gonna call bubble wrap. Like uh like that one. That's that's strong. All right, I got another one. Alohamora. So making email intro sucks. I hate doing it. It's like, oh, can you introduce this person? I gotta say, hey, Bob, meet me, Sean. He's he's this guy, he's this guy.
I'm I'm sure we're making it to one word. We're using the Harry Potter word Olahomora for the spell that just is like unlocking doors. So that's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna go to an email thread. I'm just gonna say Sam, Bob A little homora boy voice. Aloha mora, fellas. Uh I've unlocked the doors here. Go on through. And that's it. I'm shortening it to one thing. What uh but what's that word from?
Harry Potter. It's a it's the spell he uses to unlock any door. Oh my God. All right. That one's extra nerdy. All right, I've got another one. All right. So you know how in the Google calendar The default is typically thirty minutes. Mm-hmm. I hate that.
So we're gonna call this or we're gonna say, um so we're gonna use this word when it's like, Hey, put something on my calendar and let's sync storm it. We're just gonna sing storm it. So it's a by default, it's a five minute meeting. So let's just sink storm. Uh it's you know, it's people say like let's let's sync up and it's always either default thirty or sixty minutes.
Now fuck that. We're gonna sink storm this. We're gonna get done in just about four or five minutes. So hey, just put something on my calendar, put a little sink storm on my calendar and we're gonna bang this out. I love it because the other person's gonna have no idea what you mean by that, but it sounds like they're supposed to know. So yeah, no problem. Love, love stinks dormant. It's my one of my favorite things to do. And they're gonna walk away and be like, What the hell am I supposed to do? We gotta sing storm the sum of a bitch. Don't it's also nice because It's a way they're like It's it's the equivalent of dating a first date and being like they're like hey, let's grab dinner and you're like
Let's do drinks. Yeah, yeah. It's actually that. Yeah, you got to sing storm it. Um do you have? Alright. We gotta crash the boards here.
So this is a sports one that's that's gonna be used in the corporate setting. So it's when you're emailing people, but you're not following up hard enough. So you're you're you're emailing a prospect, you're trying to do a sale. And you notice There's just no follow up. There's no follow up email. So Either you could just use it like, you know, when you're following up, hey, I'm just crashing the boards here.
Or you could tell your sales team be like, Hey, we really gotta crash the boards here, fellas. And they know, Oh, that means we gotta really just follow up strong. I used to use the word blitzkrieg. When referring to that. And then I realized that referencing uh World War One, World War Two, Germany and their military tactics probably wasn't the the best thing. Uh so crazy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We had a bubble we have to bubble bubble wrap blitz screak and use crashing the boards. That's pretty good. Um
Yeah. So uh let's do um All right. So you know how when you have a meeting And Oftentimes, even if it's a good idea, you still
It turns into a vote. A lot of times. uh where it's like, look, not everyone thinks that's a good idea. So we're not gonna go with it, even though a lot of times the non popular choice is the good one. And so what you do is you try to like be political and get people on your side. Before the meeting. Uh, and so like they vote for your idea or whatever. We're gonna call that landsliding.
Um, look, we're gonna have a meeting, but we gotta land slide this in advance. It's we gotta get everyone to vote for our side and we gotta landslide this meeting. This idea needs to get landslid. So we're gonna call it landslide. That's powerful. I like that. Alright, this is when you got an employee who
It's sink or swim. You got somebody new and you need to really f figure out what they're made of. It's Are we boiling eggs or potatoes here? And it's a way to ask about somebody what they're really made of'cause when you Like a potato starts out really hard.
But if you boil it, it gets soft. But an egg starts out soft, but if you apply some heat It gets hard. And you want you want eggs. You don't want potatoes in your company. And so that's that's where you put that out there. And it's when times are getting tough. And people are are wilting, they're f they're folding under the pressure, under the heat.
You just gotta ask, or we're boiling eggs or potatoes here. That's a good one. I think that's an old phrase from the south. Haven't I heard like grandpa say that? Have you ever heard that? I have not, but maybe I got I I've been told I have an old soul, so maybe that's that's where that is. That's a good one. Um, all right, this is the last one that I have. Um We're gonna call all right. So you know you were just in a meeting where uh a guy was saying a lot of jargon.
Or oftentimes you'll be in a meeting and like People are lying. They'll be like, Well, we're doing great. Uh, and it's like, Well, we're not really doing that great. And so for that, we're gonna use the phrase bullshit bingo. It's like, hey, are we having a meeting about what we're gonna do or are we just playing bullshit bingo and winning right now? Uh we're this is th this meeting is just a game of bullshit bingo and we're killing it. And so Yeah, it's like Sean, look, you're telling me all this nonsense.
Nonsense. I think your board is full uh for bullshit. This is just nonsense. And so we're gonna call it bullshing. I like that one. It's a way to call someone out. But because it's an alliteration. It just saw it just bubble wrapped it just enough. Bubble wrap is the real winner here, it sounds like I got one last one.
This is similar to um situation where somebody's tr we're trying really hard, but we're working on the wrong things. Feels like we're just massaging elbows here. It's when you're working on a problem and you're working really hard, but the you're working on something that doesn't really matter. There's not enough meat on the bone there.
And so you're just massaging elbows. It's the wrong place to be applying the effort. I like that one. I like that one. But you have one more that I think you should you should fit finalize with. The one about a tree. So this one came from Diego, uh because I was very sorry with him. And he goes It's when you have an employee. Uh, so the phrase is
I think we're trying to teach a fish how to climb a tree. And it's when you have an employee and you put them in a position that's not really their core strength. They're great as a fish, but they need to be in water. And you put them in a position, maybe it's a a t a technical person, you got them on sales calls. And it's we're trying to put a f we're trying to teach a fish how to climb a tree here. And you'd just be better off putting them in their natural environment and letting them succeed there.
than really just working against uh you know the laws of nature. Have you used any of these phrases yet? I'm I'm gonna start. This this was the this was a brain this was a sink storm and so now I'm ready to start. Nice. Uh there is this TikTok I saw where it was this teacher and he goes My new favorite thing is to talk to my Gen Z or whatever uh students.
And to say phrases and then gaslight them that they don't know what they are. He's like I just make up phrases. And I think one of them was uh Pebbles. It was like Pebbles is like the opposite of a mountain or the opposite of a boulder. So it's like Hey, why are you crying over this problem? This is a small problem. It's pebbles, baby. Like you don't have to freak out about this. And he would just like throw these phrases in. Pebbles is a good one. And I think another one was he he was like parked. So it was um
It was a when the day is going really slow or something's not moving. So for example Uh man, it's uh Wait. It's only lunchtime now, like this day is so parked.
And uh like it's going so slow. And so he would use the in this TikTok, he's like, I use these phrases and I just and they look at me and they're like, What does that mean? And I'm like You don't know what that means? Like Nerd? You know, that's what we have to do with the bubble wrapped or teaching others how to climb a tree. We're like How do you not know what that means? We just have we have to act like it's normal. And so when we have a
had potential. Uh like I first of all parked and uh pebbles I think are elite. I don't know. I th I think bubble wrap is pretty elite to be honest. Uh but In the YouTube comments, let us know which one was uh which one you're gonna actually adopt, which one was was ready to go. We have to have some like Uh buttoned up. billionaire guests or something on on and just like using them?
We're just starting using them. Uh, do you remember that movie Super Troopers where there are cops and they're like, Hey, you want to play the Meow game? And so instead of saying now, they use the like give me your license, right Meow. Uh and they're like, let's see if we can play let's let's see who can say Meow the most. Uh that's what we have to do with our next guest is like so like uh Darmesh, did you like were you able to give it to him blunt or did you have to bubble wrap it? You know what I mean? And just see do they react or do they try to roll with it. Yeah. Um
Are we gonna wrap up here? Is that is that it? Are we are we gonna was this podcast a six storm? Yeah, I think we gotta I think we gotta end it there. All right, that's the pod. I feel like I can rule the world, I know I could be But I want to I put my law in it like my day song On the road less travel never looking back
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